Don’t Lead with Your Need

“You must lay aside your greed; have no unworthy motive in your desire to become rich and powerful. It is legitimate and right to desire riches, if you want them for the sake of your soul, but not if you desire them for the lusts of the flesh.”
~Wallace D. Wattles Quotes from The Science of Being Great

In the month of May, I went through a Dark Night of the Soul. After my second year of lengthy unemployment, and some attempts at online marketing which were not yeilding the results I thought they should, I felt ready to throw up my hands.

Financially, I felt like I was drowning and needed someone to throw me a lifeline quick, fast and in a hurry! Spiritually, I knew that there was Infinite Supply. But when Pepco turned off my lights because I couldn’t pay the bill, I thought that someone oughta’ tell God that “Infinite Supply” wasn’t showing up in my bank account!

Suddenly, I was 9 years old again, hungry and hearing my mother crying about how little we had. My childhood taught me to believe strongly in “Not Enough”.  I had plenty of experience with lack and struggle around money. Now I was ready to choose a new experience!

I know now to ask each experience what it is here to teach me. I know that every experience, no matter how challenging, offers a gift if we have the courage to recieve it. Those experiences that have caused us to feel pain come up to be healed by us and to offer the opportunity of healing to us.

And so sitting in the darkness, I asked for healing and I let the learning begin.

As human beings we want to “control” our world and arrange our universe so that we can avoid pain and perceived suffering. Ironically, it is that need to control that causes most of the pain and suffering that we experience.

So when the lights came back on, my solution to not having that experience again was to get “busy”!  Busy looking for a traditional job which I told God I didn’t want anyway, then starting with an MLM, printing up business cards, setting up websites and other platforms to push product…the busy list was endless!

Part of my healing around the energy of money, was the divine opportunity to work one-on-one with Johanna Dolan, a Financial Coach. As we pull back the layers together, some very clear patterns have begun to emerge.  One of the major ones was the memory of “longing”.

Longing is defined as: “Strong, persistent craving, a yearning especially for something unattainable or distant.”  I knew “longing” now I wanted to learn how to “desire”. The word desire actually means… of the Father.  Desire is a strong feeling, worthy or unworthy, that impels to the attainment or possession of something that is (in reality or imagination) within reach: a desire for success.

Most of us confuse “Longing” and “Desire”. They are two very different things!

Longing = unattainable and out of reach.  It’s the carrot that the ego dangles in front of you on a constant basis.

Desire = attainable and within reach. Desires are of the Father and originate from Source.

Longing keeps the focus on what’s missing. Focusing on lack creates more lack. Inside longing, you operate from a place of “neediness” and you don’t truly believe that what you ask for is possible for you anyway. When you put this energy out into the world people feel it and you come across as inauthentic and self-serving.

Desire gives attention to that which you already possess whether or not it has become manifest in the tangible world yet. Inside desire you are present to every wonderful possibility! You know you already have what you have requested from the Father. Instead of “busyness” and struggle you feel an ease and a natural flow. Instead of leading with your need, you lead with your Light! When you put this energy out into the world, everything you create works! People respond readily to your love and authenticity! You create from a place of wholeness knowing that nothing is missing or lacking and that energy is returned to you in kind!

So in closing:

  •  Practice releasing resistance to your desires!
  • Let longing go!
  • Lead with your Light!

In our next post we will discuss how to create desire and build our capacity to allow desire to create a life we want!


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